Its easy to say you're going to do better at writing, better at keeping up a blog, better and life in general. But the actual details, the daily grind of it is something else entirely.
I know I am doing good things, but they are not the things I want to be doing. And I get scared and distracted looking at that first step to go from where I am to where I want to be. Its a higher, loftier place, and the fall would be much worse from there. Or even along the way.
Fear is not the way life should be led, though it very often is. Its easy to be afraid, easy to find a reason not to go or do. Easy and comfortable to stay where its warm and safe, with a cat on your lap and a warm cup of cocoa. Its possible you, I, don't even notice the fear anymore.
But its there, curled around the leg of the coffee table and chair, holding us in place. Holding me in place. I know its there, even as I sit comfortable, full and content.
But you can't live in fear.
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